Feel Suicidal? Truth in 25 Words

By PeggySue Wells:

Despondent? Feel suicidal?

Typically this grows from a deep sense of not being loved.

John 316

I have felt like that at times.

Why go on, I reason, if no one cares? This is not the truth but it certainly feels that way.

So what is the truth?

The most quoted verse in the Bible, John 3:16, declares that God loves you and me. That he loved us before we even knew him. Before you and I were born. “For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life,” (John 3:16 NIV). So much promise and assurance is packed into those 25 words. No wonder it is often the first Bible verse put to memory.

In his book, The Joshua Code, O.S. Hawkins shared this:

An unknown, yet wise old sage once explained John 3:16 like this:

For God . . . the greatest Lover
so loved . . . the greatest degree
the world . . . the greatest company that
He gave . . . the greatest act
His only begotten Son . . . the greatest gift
that whoever . . . the greatest opportunity
believes . . . the greatest simplicity
in Him . . . the greatest attraction
should not perish . . . the greatest promise
but . . . the greatest difference
have . . . the greatest certainty
everlasting life . . . the greatest possession

Despite how abandoned I feel, this simple verse gives hope. Not hope in the ‘maybe it will or maybe it won’t’ sense. This hope is the confidence that what God said in John 3:16 is reality for you and me.

This little video should make you smile: John 3:16

PeggySue Wells www.peggysuewells.com is the author of What To Do When You Don’t Know What To Say To Your Own Family, and What To Do When You Don’t Want To Go To Church, among other books. 

Reach for a Helping Hand if You Feel Suicidal

By Martha Bolton:

 

Feel suicidal? As if you are drowning, emotionally? Ask for help.  Sometimes it only takes one hand to make a difference, and people are waiting to offer you that.

 

When I was young, I went to a pool party with a youth group.  I didn’t know how to swim so I stayed in the shallow end most of the time.  That is, until the leader and I started playing a tag-like game in the water.  Not realizing I couldn’t swim, he went under the water and grabbed my legs and took me into the deep end.  I tried standing on his back to keep myself afloat, but  needing air, he playfully knocked me off and then swam away.  Now I was in the deep end without anyone to hold on to and I immediately began to sink.

But then, I felt my body rising back toward the surface.  I didn’t break through the water, except for my hands.  I tried waving them frantically, but no one noticed, and down I went again.  That’s once, I thought to myself, recalling the “three chances” rule I had always been told about drowning victims.  I wasn’t sure if it was true or not–about getting those three chances–but I started counting anyway.

As my body rose upward for the second time, I hoped and prayed that someone would notice me.  But that time only the tips of my fingers cleared the surface.  Down I went again.

The third time up was even more hopeless as no part of my body made it out of the water.  That was my third and final chance, I thought.  I went back over my young life and prepared to meet my Maker.

I could feel my body moving upward a fourth time.  I was thankful for one extra chance, but that time I didn’t get anywhere near the surface.  I figured I had no other choice but to accept my fate.

And then I heard…

“Hey, look, she’s drowning!”  It was one of the youth. Someone had finally seen me!

From that moment until the moment my youth pastor swam over and rescued me, I knew I was going to be alright.

That’s all it takes—just one person to notice that someone is drowning and do something about it.

Ironically, while I was under that water, I could hear the sounds of all the people gathered there that day.  They were laughing, eating, and having a great time.  They were also totally oblivious that someone only a few feet away from them was going down for the last time.

Maybe you feel like you’re drowning right now and you’ve been waiting a long time for someone to notice.  This website is here 24-7 to notice.  There are resources listed here that will help you.  Caring people at suicide prevention hotlines are ready to notice, too.  People who’ve been where you are right now are waiting to talk with you.  So what can you do?  Call out.  Let someone know you’re drowning.  If they don’t hear you, don’t give up.  Keep hanging on.  Keep praying.  And keep hoping.  Someone will eventually see you and reach out to help you.  And never forget that God’s hand is always reaching out it your direction. Take it. All it takes is one hand to pull you to safety.

Survival Tips for Returning Veterans

  Are you one of those looking for survival tips for returning veterans?  So was Jeff, who said:

“You don’t know what it was like for me when I returned to the states after being in Afghanistan. My wife had left me, my children called another man daddy, and my relatives lived their lives as if they were guests on Jerry Springer.  Then, with my PTSD, it took me months before I could shop in a Wal-Mart without wanting to run out screaming.”

“Did you think about suicide?” I asked.

“A lot.”

“What got you through it?”

“Only God.”

“What would you say to other struggling vets?”

“I can’t promise that it will be easy, but when you live through it, you’ll be stronger for it. That’s how you’ll prove to everyone you can make it.”

Are you feeling suicidal after returning from a term of military service?

 

According to the Make the Connection website, there are some additional tips to help you survive your return home:

  • Reach out to other Veterans or Veterans’ groups for social support
  • Exercise regularly and eat healthy meals
  • Practice relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing
  • Recognize that others may not always agree with you or understand your military service; agree to disagree
  • Be prepared for insensitive questions or topics of conversation; practice how to respond ahead of time
  • Respectfully decline to talk about things that make you uncomfortable
  • Have a plan of action for your adjustment that includes a list of goals for your transition, your future, and your personal life
  • Try to get a good night’s sleep
  • Avoid unhealthy “quick fixes” that you think may help you cope, like drinking alcohol, taking drugs, or smoking cigarettes.

If you or someone you know is suicidal, see Make the Connection  for more tips.

Listen to other vets talk about the difficulties of transitioning into civilian life in this YouTube video below:

You might also be interested in the comprehensive 600 plus page PDF book, The American Veteran’s and Service Members Survival Guide – How to Cut Through the Bureaucracy and Get What You Need—And Are Entitled To – from the Veterans of America. Click HERE to download a free copy.

PLEASE NOTE: If you are a vet who is depressed or in danger of harming yourself or others, contact Veteran’s Crisis Line or call 1-800-273-8255 and Press 1, chat online, or send a text message to 838255 to receive confidential support 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.

If you want to find out how to reach out to God, click HERE:

Help for Chronic Pain with Suicidal Thoughts

By Karen Boerger

While vacationing recently in Florida, we were walking through the hotel lobby to begin our day when I heard my husband ask, “Are you OK?”  Again he asked, “Are you OK?” He had stopped beside a man bent over a chair. The man said he had two herniated disks in his back and was in extreme pain 24 hours a day, with no relief. He said at one point he had unloaded his guns at home. Chronic pain with suicidal thoughts threatened his life, but he showed wisdom in protecting himself when he knew the pain was causing him to not think rationally.

That comment quickly took me back to a time in our lives when my husband was having severe depression. Before he was hospitalized he had sent our 16-year-old daughter to our friend’s house with our guns.  My friend still talks about that morning; she still can’t believe it. I can’t out of my mind the look of bewilderment and concern she had as she delivered the firearms back to us later.

It’s good that my husband began a dialogue with the gentleman at the hotel, because with depression one of the helpful treatments is talking about your feelings. Social support is very important. Talking regularly with supportive family and friends is extremely helpful.  Healing from depression takes time, and patience is necessary; but making the choice to share your feelings with someone else is so important. You can also talk with others dealing with chronic pain (some hospitals have support groups), plus find hope and help online at www.restministries.org.

With treatment and support, even when experiencing chronic pain with suicidal thoughts when someone says, “Are You OK?” you will be able to boldly say, “Yes, I am!”

 A friend loves at all times . . .  (Proverbs 17:17)

Other pages here at this site:

Feeling Suicidal?

Letter 4 U?

Suicide is NOT the Final Solution

By Karen Kosman

The pain of suicide is like a jigsaw puzzle. No matter how we try, we cannot make the pieces fit together. Suicide is not the final solution. It only leaves a painful aftermath for the ones who love you. For that reason I share a portion of the letter I wrote to my son who died of suicide at the age of 23.

Dear Robbie,

Each year on your birthday, I stop and ponder what you may have become. What wonderful accomplishments you would have achieved if you’d chosen to stay. I wonder if you would have married and how many grandchildren you’d have given me. I’ll never know—you went away too soon. I miss your hugs. You always seemed to know when I needed one. I miss your smile; it always brightened my day.

 I felt a lot of anger when you left. It’s hard not knowing why you chose to leave. God impressed on my heart that I could be bitter, feel guilty, and show anger, or I could let go of those emotions—not with my own strength, but with His.

 I love you, Robbie, which will never change. But when I stand at your grave site, I can’t put my arms around you anymore. I have so many sweet memories, but I don’t have you anymore. At holidays and special moments with family, there is always an empty chair.

I am sharing your life and death with others in hopes that it prevents someone else’s son or daughter, mom or dad, or friend or relative from dying by suicide.

I know, if you could, you’d tell people that no matter how difficult life seems, it will get better. You always learned through trial and error. Robbie, your life had purpose, and I know that your suicide was your ultimate act of impulsiveness—but at what cost…

 Love,

Mom

For the suicidal individual who wants only to escape pain—there is hope. There are people who care, who have walked on the edge, but overcame. We want you live; to have a future.  Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255). Or dial 211 for help in locating essential community services, such as mental health services. The final solution is choosing to live and getting help.

Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. Isaiah 40:28-31

 

This blog post is an excerpt from Too Soon to Say Goodbye: Healing and Hope for Suicide Victims and Survivors and is used with permission by New Hope Publishers.

The following is the true story of Kellie Borden, who is glad she survived to realize suicide is not the final solution.