By Martha Bolton:They’re lies–those thoughts that swirl around in your head when life seems to have turned upside down.
I have no friends.
The world would be better off without me.
I’m not sure why some people back away when their friend goes through a crisis. Maybe they don’t know what to say. Maybe they’re waiting until they deal with their own problems before they can reach out and help someone else. Or maybe they’re just not a strong enough friend to depend on in the rough places of life. They’re superficial friends, and that’s okay.
You’ll know that now. We all have both kinds—the good times friends and the hard times friends. The problems comes when we put the right friend in the wrong column.
You may be wondering where any of your friends are right now. And if they are your friends, why are they being so silent?
All I can tell you is to not base your future on what someone else does or doesn’t do. Determine to make it through your crisis, even if the only people on your team is God and yourself. I promise you when it’s over, you will hear story after story of where people were in their lives while you were going through your lowest point. They’ll explain how they wanted to stay in touch, but thought you wanted your space. Whether you did or didn’t want space, it’s their honest reason for remaining silent.
Or they’ll tell you heartbreaking stories of how their own life was in shambles at the same time yours was, and you might regret not being in a place that you could have been there for them. And some will not even have realized that you were going through anything at all, apologize, and promise to never let you walk alone again. They may even turn out to be your closest friend from here on out.
Remind yourself that misunderstandings happen all the time:
“Did you get my call?”
“At least six times. Did you change your phone number?”
“I guess we did since the last time we talked.”
“Did your brother tell you I asked about you?”
“No. Guess he’s had a lot on his mind.”
“We’ve prayed for you at church every Sunday. You remember the old group. We laugh so much at some of the things we used to do.
“I had no idea you were feeling so down. I just thought…”
Please don’t base your self-worth on what might be a simple misunderstanding. Don’t base your self-worth on anyone else’s opinion or actions. You may have friends that you care deeply about, but that you haven’t called for one reason or another. They may be going through a rough patch in their life, too.
The bottom line is what your mind might be telling you right now could all be lies.
What is truth? God loves you, He cares about you, and He has a plan for your life. There are people in your life who love and care about you, even when you are thinking nobody cares. You may not see God’s plan right now, but no matter how far away from it you’ve gotten, or how far away you feel, it hasn’t changed one bit. Jeremiah 29:11 tells us,
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord. “Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.”
Looking for something to believe in? Believe that verse. He cares about you and wants to give you hope. He has plans for your life. And you have a future.