For Those Considering Suicide
Excerpt from Too Soon to Say Goodbye: Healing and Hope for Suicide Victims and Survivors; used with permission by New Hope Publishers.
By Susan Osborn:
I would like those considering suicide to stop for a moment and think of those who would be left behind. I know many of us go through very dark times, some contemplating suicide as a way to end it all.
King David expresses his pain during a dark moment in Psalm 31:9 “Be merciful to me, O Lord, for I am in distress; my eyes grow weak with sorrow, my soul and my body with grief.”
Charlie R. Brown wrote a beautiful poem (and prayer) that shows the emotional turmoil of the loved ones left behind when someone moves from considering suicide to accomplishing suicide.
For Those Left Behind
by Charles R. Brown
Death comes veiled in tragedy’s mask
even when we anticipate an aged patriarch’s passing.
But the loss is magnified
when a friend or loved one gives up
and pushes the button to escape the suffering.
At times like this
we sit and stare at the floor.
How, dear God, should we pray?
Our hearts ache. Our minds are crammed with why.
Sleep seems to come only with restless exhaustion.
But you, Lord, know start to finish.
Somehow let us find recreation in your completeness.
As we cherish good memories
remind us to intercede often for the children,
the friends, and the family that must continue the journey here.
We ask, too, that you would bring
refreshment from this bitter drink.
Bathe the grieving with words from you,
words of comfort and hope.
Through this unwanted stealing away,
bring the abundance of your sufficiency.
We pray this for your glory
in the name of our Savior.
Amen
See other stories in our site category, Surviving the Loss of a Loved One .
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While I understand where you are coming from and I hope that you have not lost someone to suicide yourself, I really do not like this argument, esp since it usually either implies or outright states that the suicidal person is being selfish.
Do you honestly think that most people thinking about suicide don’t think about those people in their lives who will have to deal with it? Either they believe that those left behind will actually be better off – that they are a burden to them or something along those lines; or they have been badly hurt, abandoned, rejected, seriously neglected etc by the people in their life and that’s part of the reason why they don’t want to live anymore; or they simply do not have anyone in their lives who will miss them.
For some, who are in complete misery and do not see any hope of that getting better (and yes there are chronic illnesses that will not get better during this lifetime – the argument that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem is not always true either), it may seem that those asking them to stick around but who are unwilling to actually do anything to help them make life any easier or more manageable, or may even not be very present in their lives at all, are the ones who are being selfish.
I hear what you are saying, and you are right, many people feel their loved ones would be better off without them. But this just isn’t true. I recently talked to one father who was seriously considering taking his life. When I told him that the chances that the children he left behind had a greater chance of committing suicide too, he reversed his decision. Suicide negeatively effects the lives of the ones left behind. And it’s sad to think that people who are trying to reach out to others may not be getting the help they need. But if someone is in this situation, I would encourage them to keep reaching out until they find someone who will listen or help. Call your local libary to see what resources there may be in your area, including support groups.
Appreciated your thoughts and I’m praying!
Love,
Linda