Is There Hope? Seeking Wisdom (Decision 2)

By Liz Cowen Furman:

Do you know that seeking wisdom can make a huge difference in how you see hope for the future?

Over a lifetime, anyone’s life, there are moments when one can feel desperate enough to even be thinking about suicide. There are so many things Satan uses to send a person to the brink of losing hope. And a life without hope is the one that may ponder suicide.

Liz's Bible

This is post is about Decision 2 in our series from The Traveler’s Gift. In the previous posts in this series, I promised to share with you the second decision a person can make to start getting their life to a place they want it to be. If you recall I encouraged you to get Andy Andrew’s book , The Traveler’s Gift and to start reading it.

If you are just now tuning in, here is a link where you can purchase the book on Amazon either new or used. It is also available at the library.

Decision number two for a person who wants their life to be of their choosing is:

I Will Seek Wisdom.

Are you seeking wisdom? There are many places to look for it. The most accurate place I have found wisdom is in the Bible. If you haven’t read it and even if you have, I cannot recommend it more profoundly. It changes my life nearly daily.

Listen to what the character in The Travelers Gift has to say about wisdom:

Knowing that wisdom waits to be gathered, I will actively search her out. My past can never be changed, but I can change the future by changing my actions today. I will change my actions today! I will train my eyes and ears to read and listen to books and recordings that bring about positive changes in my personal relationships and a greater understanding of my fellow man. No longer will I bombard my mind with materials that feed my doubts and fears. I will read and listen only to that which increases my belief in myself and my future. (Page 48, The Traveler’s Gift)

 

A person with courage recognizes that his future can be better and then takes steps to make that happen.

Courage is offered in Matthew 14 from Jesus himself. He says “take courage”. He offers it, but we must take Him up on His offer.

Another way to gather wisdom is to associate ourselves with people who are wise. Listen to another portion of this character’s explanation:

I will seek wisdom. I will choose my friends with care. I am who my friends are. I speak their language, and I wear their clothes. I share their opinions and their habits. From this moment forward, I will choose to associate with people whose lives and lifestyles I admire. If I associate with chickens, I will learn to scratch at the ground and squabble over crumbs. If I associate with eagles, I will learn to soar to great heights. I am an eagle. It is my destiny to fly. (Page 49, The Traveler’s Gift)

The decision to seek wisdom has several facets besides those mentioned here–be sure to see The Traveler’s Gift for more on how that can affect your future and hope.

See the video below to see and hear Mr. Andrews share a bit of his story, including recovering from homelessness and joblessness while also seeing God work through that. He focuses on how choices about the way you interact with others affects how they treat you and ultimately your future.

See our previous posts in our Is There Hope? series:

Is There Hope? Choosing New Beginnings

Is There Hope? The Buck Stops Here (Decision 1)

 

Surviving

By Martha Bolton:

Do you feel you are barely surviving?

Stop. Think for a moment about everything you’ve lived through, throughout your life. If you’re like the rest of the human race, you’ve no doubt survived your share of:

. . . bad decisions, failures, betrayal,  unfaithful friends, embarrassing moments, devastating moments, put downs, rejection, disappointment, loss, regrets,

. . . and more.

But the simple fact that you’re reading this right now means you’ve surviving!

surviving

Image by suwatpo / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

 

A lot of it hurt; perhaps a few almost did you in, but you survived. Some of the events taught you painful lessons, but you survived.  You learned who you can count on in life. And who you couldn’t. But you survived.

You may have gone down for the count a few times, but you still won because you got back up. You’re still here. You survived. Even if you’re not fully back up on your feet just yet, you’re in the process. You’re alive. You’re breathing.

Maybe you’re scarred just a bit. Perhaps a lot. But you’ve survived.

Our scars make those injured parts of us a little bit tougher. A little bit stronger. They make it more difficult for us to be injured in that exact same place the next time.

So embrace your scars. They’re proof the injury, or injuries, didn’t take you out. Even if a few of your wounds are still bleeding, stop and look at all the ones that have already healed. That should give you the assurance that this wound can heal, too.

Ask for help. Reach out to someone. There are resources listed on this site that are available 24-7. God is available 24-7 to comfort you and help you heal, too. You’ve already survived a lot. Now, you have a new wound that needs time and attention to heal, or an old one that needs a little more time to complete the healing process and to form its protective scar. Giving it that time makes sense, doesn’t it. Especially to a survivor like you.

Remind yourself that you are a survivor.  Not “could be one,” “might be one,” or “hope to be one.” You are one.

Don’t let anyone, including yourself, try to convince you that you’re not.

Loving a Suicidal Parent

by N. J. Lindquist:

Despite loving a suicidal parent dearly, one daughter saw her need to look out for her own mental health.

 

Stock Photo Image by David Castillo Dominici / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Stock Photo Image by David Castillo Dominici / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Five years ago a young woman’s mother committed suicide. Prior to that, the mother had struggled with mental illness and addictions for many years.

From ages 14 to 17, the daughter looked after the mother without telling anyone what was going on at home. At the age of 17, the daughter made the very difficult decision to leave her home before she went down the same path as her mother. And shortly after that, she made some very wise decisions on how she would live her life, which she shares in this video.

Unfortunately, the mother could not or would not change.

To honour her mother, this year, the daughter swam 500 laps to raise money for mental health in her mother’s memory.

If you’re living in a situation that is going to destroy your life, if you feel burdened down from trying to help someone who shows no intention of really wanting to change, or if you feel guilty for not being able to help someone you love, please watch this video. The story beings at the 3-minute mark.

And if you identify with the mother, please seek help from those who are qualified to give it.

Look Here For Hope

help me God, suicide, the suicidal, help, facts, prevention, your problems, survivor’s guilt, survivor stories, and the loss of a loved one — as well as info for anyone thinking about suicide, suicde.Welcome to our search engine which includes helps, statistics, and hope concerning suicide and the suicidal. You will find facts, survivor stories, suicide prevention tips as well as answers to your survivor’s guilt after the loss of a loved one. You will also find helps and info if you are thinking about suicide.

Be sure to use our powerful search tool at the upper right hand  corner of this page to search our many topics and resources.  You can also check out our arcticle categories on the upper, white tool bar or on the lower right side of this page.  You can also scroll down to see a sampling or our articles.

If you are contemplating suicide, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255). We will try to answer comments, but if you need a timely response, please call the phone number above.  (Also, see our disclaimer.)

Between a Rock and a Hard Place

By Liz Cowen Furman:

Sometimes the rough road we are traveling  leaves us feeling as if we are stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Some even wonder if it’s worth the journey and consider suicide in their efforts to find relief.

 

Image of a rock used at ThinkingAboutSuicide.com

 

Many a person has called out to God with anguished questions like:

Does my life matter?

Do You care about me?

Can You hear me?

What is the point?

Do I have a purpose for being here?

Is there a plan somewhere in this mess?

Why hasn’t God healed me?

Or restored my marriage?

How am I going to get through this?

Will I die alone?

Are you up there?

A rock and a hard place all right. If any of these questions sound like you, or you have another, let me share some great news.

If the rock you are stuck between happens to be the Rock of Ages, Jesus, you are safe. He has promised us to be with us no matter what. (See Joshua 1:5)  That means no matter what we have done, or what has been done to us, He will stick by us. All we need to do is ask Him.

In this world, you will have trouble. John 16:33

Jesus’ own words to us, but read on He continues.

But take heart! I have overcome the world.

So, when rotten stuff happens to us, instead of stomping our feet and saying Why me! Why now? I’m going to commit suicide. If we remember that bad things happen to everyone. No exceptions. Then we won’t feel so singled out and tortured.

Instead of thinking of ending it all and quitting, why not lift our eyes to the Rock? Why not pour out our pain at His feet and allow Him to work on our behalf? Why not ask Him to take the reins, and the weight off our shoulders?

We can give our burdens to Him and then hang on for dear life to The Rock?

If you are ready for some help from the One who can actually give it, here is a simple prayer you can pray to ask Jesus to take over and give you peace.

Jesus, I believe that You are God. I believe that you are all powerful. I know I have messed up and sinned against You. I am sorry. I want to give You control of my life and let You lead from now on. Thank You for loving me and saving me. Amen

If you prayed this prayer today (or ever) then relax. He’s got this one. You and I will still have burdens this side of heaven, only now we don’t have to carry them alone. We can lift our eyes to the One who will help.

Now, go for a walk to get some fresh air. Then watch Fernando Ortega sing this great old hymn to remind us both that being between a rock and a hard place isn’t a bad thing if that rock is The ROCK. Jesus Christ.

How to Comfort a Friend After a Suicide Loss

By PeggySue Wells:

When someone loses a loved one to suicide, what do I say?

How can I be the hands of Jesus to comfort a friend who has suffered such a terrible loss?

 

Image from zole4 / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image from zole4 / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

How to Comfort a Friend After a Suicide Loss

In times of deep grief, I have found that hope is more important than advice. Job said it this way,

“Do I have the strength of stone? Is my flesh bronze? Do I have any power to help myself, now that success has been driven from me? A despairing man should have the devotion of his friends,” (Job 6:12 – 14 NIV).

During those dark hours, Jesus calls us not to be experts, but to come alongside and provide enCOURAGEment.

“A friend sent flowers on that first sad Mother’s Day after my child died,” my Sunday school teacher said. “I felt loved and understood.”

Another grieving mother said,

“After the loss of my son, some people felt awkward when they saw me and turned away. I appreciated those who hugged me and said, ‘I’m praying for you.’”

Trusting God when we least understand is faith in action. Gentle comfort is given by those that put their arms around hurting people and say,

“I don’t understand either. But I love you and I am here to go through this with you.”

Romans 8:38-39 (NIV) promises, “I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

One man said,

“I was comforted by those who walked with me in the church parking lot, who sat with me so I wouldn’t be alone in my regular pew, and who invited me to lunch on an otherwise lonely weekend afternoon.”

Time doesn’t heal the wounds of someone who has had to say good-by to a loved one. Time merely teaches us to live with that oversized, gaping hole in our life and heart. We can walk beside another through the journey of grief.

Ecclesiastes 4:10 (NIV) says, “If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!”

The first year after the loss of someone special is especially difficult. Holidays are a merciless reminder that life is forever altered. Comfort your grieving friend with flowers, a note, or a memorial gift in their loved one’s name on Valentines Day, Easter, Mother’s or Father’s Day, birthdays, wedding anniversaries, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years. Soothe the sorrow of the anniversary date that marks the loss with a phone call to say, “I’m remembering you today.”

Called to mirror Jesus Christ by being His hands to a hurting world, we help others by seeing and empathizing with their pain. God consoles us so we can show compassion to others.

For additional information on coming alongside someone experiencing loss and grief, read What To Do When You Don’t Know What To Say (Bethany House) and An Early Journey Home (Discovery House).