Will I go to Hell if I Commit Suicide?

Will I go to hell if I commit suicide?

A lot of people wonder, “Will I go to hell if I commit suicide?” This is an important topic, with strong opinions on either side of the issue.

Those who think people who kill themselves will go to hell, believe this because a person who kills themselves isn’t trusting God to get them through their difficulties and therefore may not really have faith in God.

Still, there are other people who are convinced that the jury is still out, as God is in the business of forgiving all who ask.

Both of these arguments seem to make sense, so which is it?  Part of the mystery is because most people who have experienced hell after a suicide attempt don’t like to talk about it. But one exception to this rule is Tamara Laroux, who when she was a teenager, tried to kill herself by shooting herself in the chest.

Did she go to hell?  Yes.

Did she stay there?  No.

God in fact rescued her from hell, but to find out the why or how, you’ll have to watch her explain what happened in the YouTube video below. Her story has a twist you won’t expect. However, Tamara’s story certainly sheds a lot of light on the question, “Will I go to hell if I commit suicide?

So what we’ve learned from Tamara is that hell is real, and sadly, people really do exist in torment there.  But it seems God has set up a way to escape hell, in the here and now,  that has more to do with God’s grace and forgiveness when it is sought through the sacrifice of Jesus.

If you are reading this article, because you’re considering killing yourself, here are a few rules about God you should know:

  1. God loves you and does not want you to kill yourself as he has a special plan for your life.
  2. The enemy (the devil) wants to tempt you with self-inflicted death so that you can’t fulfill God’s plan for your life.
  3. You can receive God’s grace and the forgiveness of sins (through the work of Jesus who died for your sins) if you only ask him.  Click  here  to learn more about this:
  4. God will also help you walk through, then eventually walk out of your pain, if you but trust him.
  5. Don’t allow yourself to become a sacrifice to Satan, especially if you are not sure where you stand with God.
  6. Choose life – Despite how it seems, God can really take your broken life, no matter how broken it is, and turn it into a miracle.
  7. Live and dare God to show you what he can do with your life.

This day I call the heavens and the earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live. Deuteronomy 30:19, NIV

If you are hurting and  need to talk to someone, call a suicide hotline.

 

When Crisis Triggers Thoughts of Suicide

By PeggySue Wells:

 Crisis. A crisis your life may be the loss of a loved one, a serious illness, an addiction problem, a job change,  relocation, or divorce. Some crises are devastating, changing our lives forever. Others are stressful, but eventually bring beneficial outcomes. A crisis often causes us to start over.

No matter what, all crises can feel overwhelming.

Often the difference between dropping into a deep pit of despair–and for some, thoughts of suicide (because there seems to be no hope)–and pulling through is knowing this is a temporary trial. This has everything to do with the support we allow ourselves to receive.

Difficult times are a fact of life. You’ve probably already experienced your share. And the future likely holds additional challenges for you and those you love. Christ said:“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”” (John 16:33  NIV Bible).

 “God knows how to lead us to the point of crisis, and He knows how to lead us through it…There is no way out but God.”    L. B. Cowman

By definition a crisis is a turning point. People in crisis can feel helpless and desperate. They live on the edge of hopelessness, often feeling powerless to change their situation. The stress is paralyzing. A crisis can destroy someone or it can make them stronger. The turning point comes in how we face the crisis.

“Oh, how shall I find help within myself? The power to aid myself is put out of my reach.

“Devotion is due from his friends to one who despairs and loses faith in the Almighty.” 

Job 6:12-13 (New English Bible)

God promises His children that the crises in our lives will not destroy us. He will be there to comfort and carry us through difficult times. The Holy Spirit is also referred to as the Paraclete (from the Greek word parakletos) meaning the comforter who comes alongside to aid or support; the advocate. Even when crisis triggers thoughts of suicide.

“We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.

“We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body.” II Corinthians 4:7-10 (NIV Bible)

Here is a video that may help you:

A Mistake, Jail, Depression then Hope: One Day at a Time

By Karen Boerger:

Caroline – a wife, mother, soccer mom, friend, and more – enjoyed a modest life in a west coast suburb. She worked tirelessly to help with fundraisers for the school. When a friend developed a terminal illness, she and three other friends held a fundraising event for the mounting medical bills, but disaster was looming around the corner.

Being as busy as she was, she sometimes hurried through her life with little notice of the details. One day she reached for her credit card and paid for the new carpeting in her home; however, the credit card she used was for the funds raised for her friend with the terminal illness. The $6,000 didn’t come out of her personal account but from the fundraiser account.

Calamity came when the family found that there was money missing from the account before Caroline. Once it was discovered, Caroline wanted to rectify the oversight immediately; however, the family went to the police. Caroline’s busy life spiraled downward. During the investigation her picture was paraded through the media, her friends shunned her, her children were bullied at school, and Caroline spent 45 days in jail.

Feeling alone and separated from family and friends caused her to think everyone would be better off without her. She began to contemplate suicide. Her mind couldn’t seem to think of anything else. There were times when Caroline felt she was going crazy!

During a visit from her husband and youngest daughter a crack began to open in her frozen heart. Her daughter cried when it was time for visitation to be over and kept yelling, “Mommy, come home. I need you!”

She could feel her heart beginning to warm. That was the beginning of Caroline’s return to the human race. Her daughter needed her; someone found something worthwhile in her.

Putting one foot in front of the other and taking one step at a time, she began to lift her chin and press forward to find hope – one day at a time. Life would be different, to be sure, but her family needed her. They would do it together.

The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me, because the Lord has anointed me
to bring good news to the poor; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound. Isaiah 61:1

Derailing Suicidal Thoughts After Rape

By Karen Kosman:

When suicidal thoughts occur after rape, those thoughts need derailing. People can help.

 

I understood the young women’s distress as I stood by her emergency room gurney. I noticed the bruises on her arms and looked into her fearful eyes. She’d been raped.

“Hi, I’m here from the lab, and I need to take a blood sample,” I said softly. She remained silent as I drew her blood. “I’m sorry about what you are going through. As a teenager I, too, became a rape victim.”

She looked surprised, and the tears began as she said, “I’m so afraid he’ll come back. How do I go on? Right now I just want to die.”

“You take one day at a time. Eventually, you’ll start to feel safe again. Don’t be afraid to seek professional counseling. What happened to you is not your fault.”

She asked with a trembling voice, “Did you do that?”

“Yes. I did. It’s a safe place to talk about your fears.”

“Thank you. I’m glad you shared with me.”

As I returned to the lab, my thoughts churned, When someone states, “I just want to die” that’s a red flag, no matter what the circumstances. People who are hurt, or traumatized during a criminal act, need to know that others care.

Often in our daily walk we have brief encounters with people who we don’t really know, but God has allowed our paths to cross. He whispers to our hearts to reach out in love and concern.

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind, and love your neighbor as yourself. Matthew 22: 37-38

If you found this blog page because yourself have just been assaulted, or still struggle with the effects long after an assault has happened, call the National Sexual Assault Hotline1.800.656.HOPE. You can also refer others to this number to help them.

Karen Kosman is co-author of the book, Too Soon to Say Goodbye: Healing and Hope for Victims and Survivors of Suicide.

Additional Resources for Rape Victims

To read about some misconceptions about rape, see: Resources for Victims of Rape.

If you have just been assaulted, the first thing you should do is get medical attention. A Physical Evidence Recover Kit may be used to acquire evidence.

Another resource is christiansurvivors.com which includes a list of resources for rape victims in the US, UK and Australia.

To find a christian counselor in the USA, you can visit  christiantherapist.com or The American Association of Christian Counselors.

Comfort for Grieving Counselors and Parents: You Came!

By Jeenie Gordon:

It is devastating for a high school counselor to lose a student to suicide, as it is for that teen’s parents. Thankfully God offers comfort for grieving counselors and parents.

 

Stock photo with teen model, by anitapatterson.

Joe was an extremely emotionally troubled student, who often came to my high school counseling office.  He quietly waited until I was available.  Over several years we spent many hours together as he poured out his heart. I listened.

When a week went by and I hadn’t seen him, I called his home to check on him. I was told he had been admitted to a psychiatric hospital ward.

Within two weeks, he was released and was again sitting outside my office. I looked into his vacant eyes. Having counseled three years in a psychiatric hospital, I immediately recognized the look of a very disturbed teenager. Why in the world did they release him? I thought. It is obvious this young man needs long-term psychiatric treatment.

“Hi, Joe. It’s good to see you. I’ve missed you,” I softly said. This time our talk was disjointed. Joe was in no shape to deal with reality nor capable of receiving encouragement. His mind was apparently in mass confusion. I felt at a loss as to how to help him

Two days later my secretary said, “Joe’s mother is on the phone and said it’s urgent.” Sadly, Joe had taken his life.

Tears streamed down my face as I related the news to my secretary, then headed to the principal’s office. He hugged and consoled me when I needed it so badly.

My mind screamed, What could I have said to stop him? What did I do wrong? O God, why, why?

That afternoon I drove to his parents’ home, a simple humble abode that was clean as a whistle. It reminded me of my home growing up.

“Oh, Mrs. Gordon, you came. You came!” Over and over Joe’s mother cried as I held her in my arms, our tears mingling.

A few days later, I felt the intense presence of God and His sweet Holy Spirit comforting me as I sat at the funeral mass. Even though it was in Spanish, my heart was in tune. As the casket was carried down the aisle following the service, the congregation broke out in praise songs to Jesus – a cappella. Without a doubt, I had the assurance Joe’s mind was no longer clouded, and he was finally set free.

This time, Jesus came.

For families of suicide victims, sorrow and emotional pain is beyond description. It leaves a destructive mark on those left. Suicide is never an acceptable path for the current pain of the person contemplating a way out.

For those left, the questions are enormous – ones which have no logical answers. Self-blame is common. Seeking out a professional counselor, speaking to a pastor, confiding in close family and friends, and possibly temporary medication can be helpful.

This excerpt was taken from Too Soon to Say Goodbye: Healing and Hope for Suicide Victims and Survivors, and used by permission from New Hope Publishers. ©Jeenie Gordon with Susan Titus Osborn and Karen L. Kosman. (See:  Our Team.)

Hope When Marriage Separation Made Me Think: I Want to Die

By Linda W. Rooks:

Hope for those who feel suicidal after a marriage separation.

When my marriage fell apart, I felt like an old shoe thrown in the trash, unwanted by the person who was supposed to love me the most.  The man who chose me as his wife no longer wanted me.

Often I sat before the TV and saw sad stories of someone dying of cancer or someone who’d been killed in a car crash whose loved ones were in mourning.   Why couldn’t that be me?  I’d think.  They want to live, and I want to die. They’re dying and I’m alive. It doesn’t seem fair.  My marriage separation was just too painful.

And then I’d cry out, “God, why don’t you just let me die?”

I felt like part of the living dead.  My depression was so deep and the pain was so real, I felt like I was being ripped in two.

A few weeks into our separation, the typically unassertive woman who cut my hair, heard my story and challenged me with great passion not to let my husband get the best of me.  “Focus on God,” she said.  “Think about what God wants you to do, and think about your kids and what’s best for them.”

After our conversation, her words rang in my ears for the next few days. As I focused on what she’d said, I experienced a supernatural peace.  I felt somehow suspended above the circumstances of my marriage separation for a time.  And I began to take steps to get beyond my depression.

I typed scriptures and hung them up around the house—on my mirror, on my refrigerator, on the walls—so that everywhere I looked, God’s Word could encourage me.  I turned on my radio or TV and listened to Christian teachers as often as possible.  Throughout the day I listened to praise songs to lift me up emotionally.  I did everything I could to fill my mind with positive thoughts about God. These things helped me get through each day of my marriage separation until I finally began to experience God’s peace on a more regular basis.

My husband and I were separated for three years.  After God did His work in our lives, we reconciled and got back together.

It was a painful time, but today we have a strong, happy marriage, and I’m so thankful God didn’t grant my desperate cry when I told him that because of my marriage separation, “I want to die”.  Now I have experienced the truth of Psalm 30:5:

“Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning.”

While the length of your anguish might not last for a literal night and day, your pain will come to an end in God’s timing when you place it in God’s hands and allow Him to work in your life.

I’m so thankful God didn’t grant my desperate cry when I told him I wanted to die in the midst of those difficult three years. If you are suffering through a marriage separation, I invite you to visit my website at brokenheartonhold.com.  There you can find scriptures to download and suggested praise music to salve your spirit, along with many other helps.

Turn Your Life Around After a Suicide Attempt like Drew Carey

Linda Evans Shepherd

If you’ve ever wondered if you can turn your life around after a suicide attempt, consider successful comedian Drew Carey.  Drew was a young man who faced many difficulties, including his father’s death from a brain tumor when he was only eight-years-old.  A few years later, while in college, Drew attempted suicide.

But despite his struggles, and even despite the fact he dropped out of Kent State due to poor academic performance, he discovered that you can turn your life around after a suicide attempt.

Since then, Drew got help and changed his attitude to a more positive approach. That helped him develop a successful career in comedy and also helped him as the host of “Price is Right.”

Turn Your Life  Around After a Suicide Attempt

Watch Drew tell his story in the YouTube below:

You may want to reference the short online document: Suicide, Taking Care of Yourself After an Attempt by NAMI. (Click HERE.)

 

In a crisis, contact:

1-800-273-TALK (8255)

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

A 24-hour, toll-free crisis hotline funded by the federal government that will direct callers to a nearby crisis center. The Lifeline will accept calls from non-English speakers.

www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org

For more information about suicide and mental illness: American Association of Suicidology, a resource and education organization dedicated to the understanding and prevention of suicide.

www.suicidology.org or call 202-237-2280

American Foundation for Suicide Prevention

Dedicated to advancing the public’s knowledge of suicide and its prevention.

www.afsp.org or call 1-888-333-AFSP

 

Grief and Anger: Thinking About Suicide

By Dianne E. Butts:

 Grief with Anger: Lesson 3 in 10 Things I’ve Learned About Grief.

 

Sometimes when we feel angry, we want to hurt other people by hurting ourselves. When grieving, some left behind after the loss of a loved one even think silently– and may feel like screaming at the top of their lungs– “I’m angry and thinking about suicide!

I’ve learned some lessons about grief: #1: Grief Plus Exhaustion May Increase Suicidal Thoughts  and #2:  Grief and Guilt with Suicidal Thoughts? Ask for Help.  The third thing I’ve learned about grief is this:

#3: It’s okay to feel both grief and anger.  Some people may feel anger towards those who caused the death of their loved one—the drunk driver, the terrorists, etc. Others may feel anger towards the illness, like cancer.  Some even feel angry with their loved one for leaving them alone, for making them face the future without them, for dying. Still others are angry at themselves for that last argument or forgetting to say, “I love you.”

Some people become angry with God.

These feelings are natural and are not wrong. Anger is not sin (see Ephesians 4:26), but what we do with it can be wrong.  Revenge is never right, and harboring anger in our hearts will lead to emotional, spiritual, and even physical problems. Instead of remaining angry, why not find a wholesome way to “vent” or express your strong feelings?

Here are some ideas:

  • Expressing strong emotions through words is surprisingly helpful. Talk to a friend, a family member, or a counselor.
  • Join an organization, such as one that fights drunk driving.
  • Look for ways to help our nation in difficult times. Volunteer.
  • Raise money for cancer research.
  • Write your deceased loved one a letter telling him how you feel, how much you love him, or whatever you didn’t say.
  • Visit her room or grave site and talk to her out loud.
  • Talk to God. Be honest. Tell Him how angry you are at Him, but don’t stop there. Ask Him to help you work through all your feelings.

When we are sad, when things are not going well in our lives, or when we are angry, we can feel far away from God. In an article I wrote titled “When You Feel Far Away From God,” I wrote this:

“How many times have I felt so close to God one day, but so far from Him the next? I wondered… Why does God feel far away just when I need Him most—when I’m in difficult circumstances or when my situation looks hopelessly impossible?

“I never intend to move away from God, especially in tough times. Yet sometimes He feels so far away. What has happened?”

In that article you can read what I wrote about how our feelings can deceive us. Just because we feel God is far away doesn’t mean that He is far away.

He is close enough to feel your pain and know your thoughts, even when your heart is crying out “I’m angry and thinking about suicide!”

Video:  If you’re feeling both grief and anger, God knows and He cares. Listen to the wonderful words of this Country Western song “God In Heaven Knows” by The New Hinsons:

 

Worry About Teen or Child Suicide After Loss of a Loved One

By Liz Cowen Furman:

Are you concerned that a young person in your life may attempt suicide while grieving the death of a loved one?

Help is available to help prevent teen or child suicide after loss.

 

Teen or child suicide after loss of a loved family member is feared by some parents. The Dougy Center can help grieving families.

After Papa’s death our kids were very upset; partly because they didn’t get to say goodbye. They planned to go to the hospital the next day to see him. We all thought he was coming home in a day or two, not going home forever.

Papa lived with us so our children were very close to him. Our oldest was 14.  I was worried about him, so I called a local church (we had just moved and were between churches) and asked if my son could see one of their counselors. He only went for one visit, yet it seemed to help him immensely.

Sometimes just getting it off your chest is a very helpful thing. After a significant loss teenagers sometimes have a very difficult time coping. If you are helping a child through the loss of a loved one, especially if you are worried about teen suicide, below are some things to watch for and some helpful hints.

The death of a parent or other important person while the teenager still needs them can be devastating. At this age, their faith can be a big help. It is important that your teen has the chance to talk with adults who are also grieving. Expect that your teen will have things to say that are difficult. Be open to the possibility that they feel anger toward you or the one who left. Give them plenty of chances to talk about their feelings and be accepted.

Symptoms of Teen Suicide Risk After a Significant Loss

Seek help if your teen:

  • Withdraws for more than a week or two.
  • Doesn’t seem to care about school or other activities that were  important to them before the death.
  • Has trouble sleeping, does not eat, or starts having behavior problems such as destroying things.

Seek professional help immediately if your school age or teen child seems to be making plans to join the dead person and:

  • Gives away treasured possessions
  • Expresses desires to hurt or kill themselves.

A great resource for grieving children is the Dougy Center: The National Center for Grieving Children and Families. At their website you can search here for support groups in your local area ( Grief Support Programs) and find additional help. They have special webpages on the site specifically for children and teens.

Tell your child: “Hold on to hope! You will get through this time. Grieving is hard work, but remember we are walking THROUGH the valley of the shadow of death, we aren’t to stay there.”

Though I walk in the midst of trouble, You will revive me; You will stretch out Your hand against the wrath of my enemies, and Your right hand will save me.  (Psalm 138:7 NKJV)

My prayer for you today:

LORD I lift up the person reading this and ask You to give them your heart on how to help their child deal with the loss they are facing. May Your words be their words and may they all come out on the other side of this trial whole and closer to  You than ever. In JESUS Name we pray. AMEN

Lift up to God any fear of child suicide after loss, and find support for your child if necessary. Here’s a video with more information about the Dougy center:

Help for College Students Feeling Depressed and Suicidal

It appears that suicidal thoughts among young people in college is more common that we might think.  It’s been reported that suicide is the third leading cause of death for those aged 15-24, and the second leading killer in the college population, with 1 in 12 having created a suicide plan.

A young person’s college career is suppose to be exciting, full of promise, new activities and friends. It’s also full of stress. According to at Suite 101, “Leaving friends and family, entering a different world with new people to meet and new challenges to overcome can leave many students feeling anxious, especially those entering their first year of college.”

The article, College Students and Depression on the Preisz-McMillin Clinic, Inc. website states, “At colleges nationwide, large percentages of college students are feeling overwhelmed, sad, hopeless and so depressed that they are unable to function. According to a recent national college health survey, 10% of college students have been diagnosed with depression and including 13% of college women.”

Tips On Dealing With Depression in College

When it becomes difficult to deal with changes and stress, to find your way back to happiness try these suggestions from the Preisz-McMillian Clinic, adapted from the National Mental Health Association.

Carefully plan your day
Make time every day to prioritize your work. Prioritizing can give you a sense of control over what you must do and a sense that you can do it.

Participate in an extracurricular activity
Sports, theater, fraternities and sororities, the student newspaper – whatever interests you – can bring opportunities to meet people interested in the same things you are, and these activities provide welcome change from class work.

Seek support from other people
This may be a roommate or a friend from class. Friendships can help make a strange place feel more friendly and comfortable. Sharing your emotions reduces isolation and helps you realize that you are not alone.

Try relaxation methods
These include meditation, deep breathing, warm baths, long walks, exercise – whatever you enjoy that lessens your feelings of stress and discomfort.

Take time for yourself every day
Make special time for yourself – even if it’s only for 15 minutes a day. Focusing on yourself can be energizing and gives you a feeling of purpose and control over your life.

Work toward recovery
The most important step in combating depression and reclaiming your college experience is to seek treatment. Your physician should communicate to you that remission of symptoms should be your goal and work with you to determine whether psychological counseling, medication or a combination of both treatments is needed.

One college student, Zach, was able to overcome his depression that was triggered when, after buying a ring for a girlfriend, she broke up with him. This loss, heavy drinking and isolation put him into a depression downward spiral. His thoughts of suicide and depression decreased when he stopped drinking, got physically active and realized that good friends are essential. You can watch his story below:

If you need to talk someone, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-TALK or 273-8255